How often have we wanted to complain about something and we could not do. Here, proposes a series of steps to express anger through constructive complaint. Thus, you can communicate your anger appropriately and effectively.
Who has not felt rage when someone slips him while waiting for the bus. Or when you’re at the movies and just behind you there is a group of people who can not stop talking. Or when you get a very high phone bill, call the phone company and tell you that it is a mistake but that first you have to pay the bill and then makes you return.
These are situations that cause anger and, in these situations each can act in a more or less submissive and more or less aggressive.
Learn to express your anger
How many of us we have gone through life trying to always pleasing others, pleasing each other. How many times we wanted to complain about something and we could not do it, how many things we wanted to say that they have not been said. In return, have managed to let others speak well of us: “what good is, poor thing, always thinking of others”. And meanwhile, we “disabled” for life, full of rage and resentment.
On one side is the submissive that represses his anger and does not complain. The consequence is that the person will feel more and lower self-esteem and less right, which will make your relationships with others into poverty.
And on the other hand, we have the angry person expressing their anger with violence. It is likely that these people receive little social support and have very few friends because no one will want to be with a very angry person.
The problem therefore is that we express the rage and we are submissive or aggressive. We propose to learn to express it properly through constructive complaint.
Steps to convey a constructive complaint to another person:
What to do before complaining:
* Clarify your complaint: what I want to complain?
For example, I complain because I have received a bill where I load a service that I have not asked. I’m not complaining about how expensive it is the service or on the bad day I had today.
* Choose the time, person and place to pass your complaint
It is important to choose a time when I’m quiet, once I have missed the heat of anger itself. I also have to choose a place that encourages communication, where there are not many noises. Finally, it is necessary to direct the complaint to the appropriate person.
How to convey your complaint:
1. Describe the problem situation as detailed and objective as possible
These describe the situation with details and facts, as objectively as possible. What is not appropriate is to explain how I feel so run down, beat about the bush or the other person explaining what I did this morning or my personal problems.
2. Express yourself first saying what you feel about the situation.
3. Explain how you would like that you had been based on your needs.
4. Talk about the mutual benefit that you may have obtained if it had happened any other way.